Plan F:

We saw the radiation oncologist last Thursday, who strongly recommended the cyber knife radiation of my abdominal tumor. After much thought and discussion with my oncologist, I have decided to go that route and to do it as soon as possible. I had a CT scan yesterday (tumor slightly larger) and will begin the radiation either this coming Monday or Tuesday. I will go in every day for 1 to 1½ hours for 5 days in a row. Supposedly will only have mild fatigue, perhaps mild nausea and perhaps some mild reflux ... sure. Symptoms should subside within a few weeks.

Part of the reason for doing this sooner than later is that Paul will be having his shoulder surgery mid-to late November and one of us needs to be functioning normally, what ever that is.

On a positive note, we spent a glorious weekend in Marble with friends (thanks, Jodi and Max), the mountains are a brilliant gold and red, the Broncos and the Rockies are kicking ass. Yes, life is good…

Love,
Nyshie

from Nysh...

Well, the fun just never ends. I was evaluated yesterday by a radiation oncologist here in the Springs for the possibility of having a “cyberknife” radiation of the abdominal tumor. His feeling is that there are probably smaller ovarian cells (too small to see with a CT scan) but that radiating the existing tumor into oblivion could prolong chemo for some time (yippee!!). He doesn’t know for sure, but if it’s even a possibility, I’m willing to try it. I’ll find out tomorrow night for sure if he thinks it’s feasible. It’s supposed to have very minimal side effects (slight fatigue and possibly slight nausea). I’m still planning on not doing any treatment until the middle of November, yes, just in time for the holidays again. You can google it at “Rocky Mountain Cyberknife.”

Paul had his purple mountain majesty cast removed yesterday. The doc said it is “healing”, but not “healed.” Now he has a knee high boot that he is able to remove for a shower. This afternoon we found out that his MRI done yesterday revealed significant left shoulder rotator cuff tearing. He’ll see an orthopedist for that within the next couple of weeks, but probably not surgery until, you guessed it, around Thanksgiving.

“Getting old isn’t for sissies, but it’s better than the alternative.”

Love you all,

Nyshie (aka Big Giant, aka Grandma Nysh)

P.S. Wanted: strong, young, good-looking houseboy/girl to assist rapidly deteriorating older couple from the middle of November until after New Year’s. Free room and board. Spectacular mountain living with lovable cat included.

Update

Hello,

We’ve been on quite a roller coaster for the last couple of weeks trying to decide on the best treatment option for the reoccurrence of my cancer. From the CT scan, it appears that I have one 2 cm. tumor in a lymph node in the center of my abdomen. To make a long story short, we’ve discussed this with 2 oncologists, 2 OB/GYN oncologists and a radiologist with possible options for surgical removal of the tumor, cyber knife radiation of the tumor, and/or chemotherapy. As of today (for a variety of reasons), we have decided to simply do the chemotherapy and to postpone starting it for about 2 months. The physicians’ opinions are that waiting a couple of months won’t make any difference in the long run, that the tumor is very slow growing and that the chemo will be just as effective if we wait. The oncologist in Southern California (Thanks, John) spoke very clearly with me about trying to achieve some quality of life during the months when I feel well, which I do now.

As long as I can keep my head clear and a positive attitude, I plan to enjoy the beautiful fall weather, do a little fly-fishing, allow Paul’s foot to heal so he’ll be healthy, enjoy my two granddaughters, go stay with my parents for a couple of weeks and just live and be happy.

“We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.”
Charles Swindoll

Love you all,
Nyshie (aka Big Giant)

Weekend update...

Thought you’d all like to see the purple dancing bear! We’re having fun now. But seriously, he’s supposed to be non-weight bearing for 3 weeks, will see the doc and have another x-ray and could continue non-weight bearing for an additional 3 weeks. Depends on how it heals.




Beth and Danny took the dog to help us out for the weekend and have fallen head over heels in love with him. This morning we formally gave them “Jack.” We thought a lot about it and decided it was a better situation for everyone involved, especially the dog.

I see my oncologist on Wednesday to discuss chemo options and Thursday will see the new ob/gyn/oncologist to see if he thinks there’s any value in trying to remove the tumor surgically, or if it's even possible. More details to follow…


“It’s not the years in your life, it’s the life in your years.”

Abraham Lincoln

from Nysh...

Paul and I just returned from a 5 day fly fishing trip out of Buffalo, Wyoming. We rode horses out from the base camp for 5 hours over very, rocky terrain and stayed in our “tent” camp for 3 days. We had wonderful fishing, mostly little brookies, incredible food and ended up bringing home a new dog. One of the wranglers had a 7 month old border collie, named Jackson, whom he had to find a new home for. Paul fell in love with him, what could I say? I think he’ll be his new fishing buddy for the next 6 months.

I had my needle biopsy Monday morning and just got the pathology results from the oncologist. It is the ovarian cancer returning and I’ll start chemo at the end of next week or the beginning of the following week. I’ll update as soon as I know for sure, meeting with the oncologist next week to discuss chemo options.

Today I'm heading to a 4 day retreat for women who have cancer. It’s held at the Shambhala Mountain Center North of Ft. Collins at Red Feather Lakes. It includes meditation, yoga, group sessions, etc. I’m really looking forward to it as a possible means to get emotionally prepared for starting the chemo again. What else can I say? This is the hand I’ve been dealt, my only choice is to play it with as much courage and grace as I can.

I love you all.
Nyshie

Update...

The long awaited appointment with my oncologist was this morning. I was very fortunate to have Paul, Maggie and Ben with me. Overall, we feel it was pretty good news, or at least better than we were imagining. My CA125 remains at 30. The PET scan did show a 2 cm tumor in an abdominal lymph node, which is larger than a previous scan. He’s 95% certain that it’s a return of the ovarian cancer, but will need to do a needle biopsy to be absolutely certain. I’ll have this done by a radiologist within the next week or so. If it’s confirmed as ovarian, then I’ll begin on the same chemo routine as before, every three weeks for six sessions and yes, I’ll lose my hair again, damnit!

The bad news is that this particular tumor has situated itself nicely between my abdominal aorta and my kidney, which makes it virtually inoperable. Way too risky to be wielding a scalpel on and around my aorta. The good news is that the cancer responded very well to the chemo before so no reason to think otherwise this time.

Long term, I’ll just continue to have it scanned probably twice a year and most likely, will need to have chemo on again off again indefinitely. Who knows, perhaps my hair will come back straight next time?

Another great Bernie Siegel quote:

“Even if what you most hope for-a complete cure-doesn’t come to pass, the hope itself can sustain you to accomplish many things in the meantime. Refusal to hope is nothing more than a decision to die.”

My heart is continually refilled with hope from all of the love and support from each and every one of you.

Love you all,
Big Giant Nysh

Brief update...

Hi,

Nysh asked me to send out a quick update. She had the catscan and the petscan (sp?) today. She will repeat the CA125 on Wednesday and meet with her oncologist on Thursday of next week. She or I will post an update after that appointment when we have more information and a better idea of what is next.

Thanks and love,
Maggie