What to say ...
I think Maggie pretty well summed things up in her previous
posting. I am recovering from the cardio
thoracic surgery, although having more pain than I had anticipated. The surgeon said it is equivalent to having
ribs broken, so not to expect too rapid of a recovery. All of the biopsies he
did from the heart and lung sacs, my diaphragm, etc. all came back positive for
metastasis of ovarian disease.
A quick thank you for all the
cards/food/calls/flowers/emails ... too many to respond to individually.
The discussion with my oncologist was sobering. As Maggie
said, he commented that we have been fighting the good fight, but now the
cancer is winning. He was not very
encouraging about the chemo I’m starting tomorrow, but thinks it’s worth a try.
I hate to be so morose but he thinks that if the chemo doesn't work to slow
down the growth, we’re looking at months.
Hopefully, I’ll have another Christmas with the kids & grandkids. The ambiguity is
the worst part. Ben is planning on
coming back to the Springs, probably within the month. He’s looking at options for completing his
Master’s program, which he would have completed this semester. As one more
treatment option, we are exploring the use of cannabis/marijuana as a
“treatment” for the cancer itself, not just to reduce the side effects of the
chemo. There is a lot of research going
on in this area, just very limited and guarded here in the states. The next
time you see me, I may be even more goofy and chatty (yes, it’s possible,
Ellen).
The kids and Paul and I are trying to be open and discussing
what all this means. Tough stuff for sure. Paul asked me where I want to go,
what do I want to do in the next few months and honestly, there are children to
love, grandchildren to hug and enormous basil waiting for me in my
greenhouse ... it just doesn't get any better than that.
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have really lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love. - Henry Drummond
Love you all,
Big Giant Grandma Nysh |
| fly fishing in Mammoth in July |
 |
| today with baby Nyshie fabulous tee from niece Leslie, "EFF CANCER" |